Forget -- The Walking Dead Season Five -- Review

Are you over Carol's little death story?  Me, either.  It's printed below, if you want to read it.

--As I mentioned before, it looks to me like they're the villains now--or the anti-heroes, if you will.

--Carol's nuts and Rick is murderous.  One said the scariest things I've ever heard an adult say to a kid.  The other very strongly considered shooting a guy to be with his wife.

--It's Alexandra Breckenridge, so that's almost understandable.  But still...

--Buttons just didn't feel like running anymore.  That was incredibly sad, but also a symbol for how Daryl is feeling.

--Too much running makes you tired.  Literally and figuratively.

--But, poor Buttons.  I mean, damn.

--As that was on, I opened my mail.  I got something from PETA.  There were pictures of hundreds of dogs in a cage in China, ready to be slaughtered for their meat.  Cats, too, for their fur.

--I mean, DAMN.

--But I always give to them.  I will this time, too, when I get paid.  I like that they also supply you with an attached receipt you can fill out for your taxes.  I know convenience is lazy, but why not do everything you can so people can donate?  Though some will just fill that out and not donate, I know.

--I give to PETA and the ASPCA and the Humane Society and sometimes Best Friends, in case you were wondering.  If you're looking for something to give to, these are great choices.

--Back to the show...

--Ironically, Daryl might be the one most ready to settle down.  He may even shower soon.

--That kid's going to tell on Carol.

--And then he's going to get it.  (Maybe.)

--Jessie's husband is certainly going to get it.  He should be wearing a red shirt.

--So, too, probably, is Jessie.  (Sorry.)

--Representative Monroe, the lady who leads Alexandria, sees more than she's showing.  I'm not sure Carol's fooling her.

--Where'd Father Gabriel go?  He didn't enter with the group, right?

--Somebody's branding the walkers with a "W."  If you know my politics, you know who I think it is.

--Though someone would have to help him with the spelling, of course.

--(Sorry.)  C'mon, though, it was funny.  Okay, whatever.

--True, Michonne put the sword on the wall.  But it's within easy reach.

--And you know she'll be using it very, very soon.  I mean, there are just three episodes left.

--Because it bears repeating, here's Carol's little speech to the kid, copied from this very, very, very good review from the Wall Street Journal online:

“One morning you’ll wake up and you won’t be in your bed. You’ll be outside the walls. Far, far away. Tied to a tree. And you’ll scream and scream because you’ll be so afraid. No one will come to help. Because no one will hear you. Well, something will hear you. The monsters will come. The ones out there. You won’t be able to run away when they come for you. And they will tear you apart and eat you up all while you’re still alive. All while you can still feel it. And then afterwards, no one will ever know what happened. Or, you can promise not tell anyone ever what you saw here, and then nothing will happen. And you’ll get cookies. Lots of cookies.” She smiles. “I know what I think you should do.”

--And read that linked review for the clip of where we've all seen the "W." before.  Did you remember that?  Yeah, I didn't, either, though I did know I'd seen it somewhere before.  Here it is again, for your convenience.  That site always does a great job.

Walking Dead: Episode 2--"Infected"

 Photo: from Time.com.  Karen, we hardly knew ya.  Unless, of course, you were wise enough to put your bracelet around someone else, knowing that someone was going to kill and burn the sick.  And if that actually happened, maybe you, Karen, are killing and burning the sick.  Or maybe I just overthink things.  But the more I think about it, the more I like this storyline of mine.

A few quick things about this episode:

--The sacrificing of the pigs was incredibly depressing.  I'm trying to convince myself that they were going to all get sick and die anyway.

--So much for Farmer Rick.

--Never once in any episode has anyone ever said the word "zombie."

--Why wouldn't the walkers go back to the gate and knock it down after they finished with the pigs?

--I liked Karen.  Oh, well.

--The squealing of the pigs reminded me of The Silence of the Lambs.  That's how my noggin' works.

--How come nobody smelled the burning bodies?

--I'm surprised more wasn't done with the cellblock and gate-crashing walkers.  Separate or together, they could've driven everyone out of the prison.  Permanently.  And the gate-crashers still might.

--I'm tiring of all of the ads for Walking Dead-related products and games.

--I've never heard of Hayley Williams or Paramore, for those of you who saw The Talking Dead afterwards.

--For awhile there, I thought the baby was going to turn and bite the blonde girl.  I'm so young, yet so cynical.

--I agree with The Talking Dead's guest: Lizzie is feeding rats to the gate-crashing walkers.

--And I'm saying that Herschel killed and burned the sick.

--Hopefully nobody from PETA watched this episode.

--Carol's gotten weird.

--And the kid who plays Carl had a massive growth spurt.

--If Daryl's in charge, he's not effectively keeping law and order amongst his own people.  Nobody would be feeding rats to the dead during the Ricktatorship.  (Yeah, I stole that.)

--Rick's a bit of a lost soul right now.  But he'll be asked to lead them again, and he'll reluctantly agree to do so.

--It's been so long since I've seen an episode as it aired that I didn't realize how impossibly long the commercial breaks were.  I know there's a lot of commercials, but this is way too much.

--Which is why I'm going to watch as many episodes as possible on DVR.

--A viewer's awesome question: Herschel was a veterinarian, so why didn't he look at the dead pig to find out how it died?  Greg Nicotero's answer was simple enough: Rick never told him about it.  Technically I guess that's true, but that answer still is unsatisfying BS.  But you can't think of everything, I guess.  And Herschel mentions in the middle of the episode that he knows there are sick hogs, and Rick says right there that he saw a dead pig the day before.

--And how did they know that Patrick was the first one to die?  Carol and the others in the library knew that he didn't feel well, but they had no evidence in the carnage that followed that he was the first to go.

--So I don't feel so old and out of touch, I'm going to Wikipedia Paramore now.  ::later:: Oh.  Eh.  Sort of like Hanson, but female.  I'm seeing some early 80s pink pop, a la Cyndi Lauper, kind of.  I'd read they were alternative rock, but that's not what I saw in the video "Still Into You."  That ain't alternative.  It's bubble-gum pop for girls between 7th and 11th grade, or so.  Like, whatever, man.